Tag: Humor

The Drinker fixes Fat Thor and Luke Skywalker

There aren’t too many theaters open right now because of the Chinese Flu (or our response to it) but that doesn’t mean we can’t make fun of some terrible creative choices in big-budget films right? One of the channels that I’ve started to frequent more recently is The Critical Drinker and it’s a great channel that you should check out when you have the chance. The Drinker’s latest projects are to think of coherent and far better ways of writing how titular and beloved characters that have been emasculated/ruined by Disney® and its incompetent “creative” decisions. The videos are quite well done and the possibilities to fix the numerous character inconsistencies should have been apparent to a large team receiving hundreds of millions of dollars to make these films. But, I suppose that Disney’s® Marvel™  and LucasFilm™ needed to force certain characters down our throat and add some diversity in the worst ways possible. Enough of my ranting though, enjoy these awesome videos and their acerbic wit!

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Jeff Lebowski, is that you?

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Buy! Consume product! Question nothing! Submit!

Endless trash from Disney’s Star Wars

Buy everything! Question nothing! Consume product! Just buy more Disney’s© LucasFilm™ toys, DVDs, Disney+ access, and just accept what is being pushed on you. I could state my opinions on the latest Star Wars trilogy but why bother when so many others can do so much more exquisetly? I watched The Force Awakens and was mildly satisfied while watching it and found The Last Jedi to be confusing and awful (Disney’s© LucasFilm’s™ strange anti-capitalist message was more than a little ironic to me). In light of this I’m not even going to the theater to see the latest product from Disney’s© LucasFilm™ and am just watching some reviews of it instead. I liked them quite a lot and I hope that you find them entertaining as well, enjoy!

Red Letter Media is simply amazing!

Remember: “They can fly now!!!

The Rise of Skywalker predictions video

Well everybody, yet another Star Wars movies is about to be released so that means it is time for another Red Letter Media prediction video about The Rise of Skywalker! I have written before what I think about how this film will turn out but now Mike and Rich have attempted to perceive what will happen in what has turned into an over-bloated Disney disaster of a commercial project and I want to spread the news of this far and wide. I think that I will see this film just to watch what J.J. Abrams does to try and salvage the Star Wars film series. I think that it will be hilarious…

 

No One’s Ever Really Gone

The Star Wars Episode IX teaser trailer just came out and boy am I amazed at how invested the fanboys are into what has become a soulless Disney product. I don’t get the reaction videos that I’ve watched. There are a lot of good movies out there that I really enjoy but I don’t understand crying to a teaser trailer where people that you thought were dead come back to life. What can I really say about Star Wars that others haven’t already said in a far superior manner? I believe that I can allow the following videos and images speak for themselves…

How soy-filled can one man be?

I feel as though Mister Metokur has a pretty good take on the preceding man-baby:

Be afraid, DesTiny is coming for you Rethuglikans!!!

I saw this clip and I just had to put up another short post about what I witnessed. Are you afraid and quaking in your boots yet? Well you should be because Incestiny is coming for you!!! Watch what happens when you guzzle pure soy and behold the threatening spectacle of a typical Antifa member!

Assassination by Forklift

In another interesting story that would’ve gotten a lot more coverage if someone else was President a North Dakota man was arrested for stealing a forklift in an attempt to kill President Trump. Gregory Lee Leingang was going to make his move as President Trump passed through Bismarck, North Dakota and according to U.S. Assistant State Attorney Brandie Russell: “The intent was to basically try to get to the limo, flip the limo and get to the president and he wanted to kill the president.” More simply amazing details from the story:

Leingang tried to escape after the forklift got stuck in a gated area, according to reports. He was caught by local police and allegedly confessed his plan to authorities, including the U.S. Secret Service.

Leingang ended up pleading guilty in court and was sentenced to five years in prison. Based upon the fawning representation of former President Obama I have to wonder how such a story would have been treated just a few years ago?

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All I see are NPCs! We live in a society!

It’s amazing how such an accurate description of progressives can hurt them so badly and quickly. The New York Times article on Non-Playable Characters (NPC) is so unintentionally hilarious I can’t help but wonder if it’s written by a Republican as a joke. Let’s take a look at a modern socialist’s attempts to understand humor and the Internet:

The campaign, which was born in the fever swamps of 4chan and Reddit message boards, involved creating hundreds of fictional personas with gray cartoon avatars, known as NPCs.

The enlightening commentary on Internet jokes just keeps getting better and better:

These accounts posed as liberal activists and were used to spread — among other things — false information about November’s midterm elections

What the hell, does the author think that this is some elaborate scheme by the Russians (who can do everything by the way)?

NPC Wojak is a variation of Wojak, an old cartoon (also known as “feels guy”) that has become a kind of collective mascot for the far-right commenters online. In recent weeks, users on 4chan and Reddit have made all kinds of memes featuring NPC Wojak.

Oh look, tis the far-right pejorative used again on someone that doesn’t agree in lock-step with the Democratic Party and media.

And then, when progressives object to a meme that portrays them as unthinking automatons, it becomes another piece of evidence: See? The left can’t take a joke.

Glad to see that we can agree that the left has no sense of humor. If you guys could take a joke there would’ve been no need to write this dumb article or for Twitter to ban thousands of obvious parody accounts.

The campaign began as a joke. But a few of the accounts started posting misleading information about the midterm elections, including encouraging liberals to vote on Nov. 7. (Election Day is Nov. 6.)

Damn, the author really doesn’t have a sense of humor does he? Has Mr. Alex Burns never heard this joke before? Does he really not understand it? This next excerpt takes the cake though:

Are these Russian bots?

Probably not. (Although some of the NPC accounts may have been automated, there is no sign that Russia is involved in this.) Mostly, it appears to be a 4chan joke that spiraled into some mild voter suppression.

An Internet meme is now voter suppression, who knew? Since the NPC meme is so clearly effective and accurate why not post up some NPC memes? Enjoy and be sure to share with your fellow NPCs!!!

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An article by The Independent is also pretty hilarious.

I just saw “The Predator”

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I just saw The Predator a few nights ago and it was pretty awful. Where to start with this terrible, mind-numbing film? Is it the bad CGI of the spaceships chasing each other? Is it the fact that one of the Predators wanted to save humanity while simultaneously killing every human he passed by? Is it the fact that all of the horror and suspense elements have seemingly been replaced by bad lines and terrible, non-stop, and just confusing humor and jokes? The fact that a child with Asperger’s is a savant (oh yeah, it’s “the next step of human evolution“) that can in a few hours decipher an alien language and fully understand how to use technology developed by the Predators? Do you like references? Well I hope you do, because this movie is full of them (“Get to the choppers!” “You are one beautiful motherfucker.“) The tone of the movie was just so confusing and contrived; did Shane Black really star in the first Predator film? I don’t think he understands what made the first film the masterpiece that it is. I guess what a Predator film needed was humans jumping on a spaceship that can fly faster than any human jet or a man with Tourette syndrome for the sole purpose of comic relief (which magically goes away whenever the script demands it).

What more could you possibly ask for in a film?

Thoughts on “The Predator” Final Trailer

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What’s Hollywood up to today? How about another Predator film but this time I can’t even tell how I’m supposed to feel about it. The final trailer has rap music and almost makes the film feel like a comedy. It wasn’t enough for Fox to produce AVP and AVP Requiem, now it needs to feel like a slapstick with a bunch of comedic gags. So much for that feeling of horror and suspense, what we need is excessive CGI effects and constant jokes. Maybe they’ll just stop one of these days? I’ll watch this movie tomorrow anyway just to see if it turns out horrible or as a decent film.

I mean, it can’t be worse than Slenderman: